Today is the first time I heard my beloved one's voice. Umm.. it's a heavy voice, but I love it.
I do love his voice.
We tried to talk on phone, I could hear him, but unfortunately he didn't hear me. Maybe it's because my wi-fi is f*cking bad. I thought that the wi-fi is good but the fact it was bad.
So.. I tried to record my voice to say some words for him.
First trial, failed. I sent the uncompleted recording lol.
The second.. success!!
He said that I have an accurate Japanese and my voice is beautiful lol I don't know that's the truth or not, but it makes me confident to speak Japanese more fluently.
I'm bad in talking, not only in Japanese, but also in Bahasa, I'm not talking frequently, except to some closest friends. That's why I don't have any confidence to talk using foreign languages.
I said that we should try talking again any time on phone, and he agreed.
By the way, he has to have his medicine twice a day, at morning and night. I just don't know what he will do if he fell asleep when he's working. I don't know the exact time he needs to have the medicine. I hope he can manage it so he can still work well. Maybe it's better if he takes some holidays more? Working as public servant is hard, right? I feel worried about this.
I don't know but, I just want to hug him and ask him to share his burdens on me too.
Why am I so far?
Saturday 19 April 2014
Friday 18 April 2014
Long time no blogging and today's shocked moment
Feels like I don't need to tell when I wrote the last post here lol
and now I'm posting just because I don't have anyone to talk right now, and my beloved one just fell asleep.
Today he was feeling sick and not well. He went to the hospital to check his health. First time he said that he wants to go to hospital, I was shocked and thought that there's something wrong about his body. He feels pain around his eyes when he looks light (from electricity). He said he went to dermatology first then to ophthalmology. I felt strange about the name and thought about something serious. A serious disease of course. I felt worry right away and curious about the result of examination.
Then..... he said that he has Zoster or Shingles or Herpes zoster or whatever the name.
Just could feel goosebumps. Speechless. Powerless.
His doctor said that he has that disease because of the accumulation of stressful and tiring feeling in his body. And it is right that the disease is the result of stressful and tiring feeling . I just can't imagine how stressful he is, how tiring his body is, so that the disease has attacked his body. I just can't say anything but support him far away. I don't want to think anything but hoping that he will be okay, as he always says "大丈夫だよ" on our chat.
Usually I forces him to talk with me until late night because I always missed him and don't have much time to talk. I always forget that we are in different timezone. His place is 2 hours faster than here. Thinking about that, I feel that recently I has cut his sleep time and I feel bad right now. Though he said that it's not my fault but I still feel bad. His sleep time has been chaos and everyday he needs to go working so early. He needs to have much sleep time, and I really need to hold my own feelings back, not to have him talking with me whenever I want. I need to do that!
I think to make his sleep time early than before. From now, he has to go to bed on 8 or 9 pm. I know that our quality time will be cut more, but it's okay if it's for his health. So, whenever we have free time, it will be our precious time. And his medicine will make him feeling asleep, so I think it will make him sleep faster easily. That's all I'm thinking about.
But, I can't do anything for him right now, and it's painful.
and now I'm posting just because I don't have anyone to talk right now, and my beloved one just fell asleep.
Today he was feeling sick and not well. He went to the hospital to check his health. First time he said that he wants to go to hospital, I was shocked and thought that there's something wrong about his body. He feels pain around his eyes when he looks light (from electricity). He said he went to dermatology first then to ophthalmology. I felt strange about the name and thought about something serious. A serious disease of course. I felt worry right away and curious about the result of examination.
Then..... he said that he has Zoster or Shingles or Herpes zoster or whatever the name.
Just could feel goosebumps. Speechless. Powerless.
His doctor said that he has that disease because of the accumulation of stressful and tiring feeling in his body. And it is right that the disease is the result of stressful and tiring feeling . I just can't imagine how stressful he is, how tiring his body is, so that the disease has attacked his body. I just can't say anything but support him far away. I don't want to think anything but hoping that he will be okay, as he always says "大丈夫だよ" on our chat.
Usually I forces him to talk with me until late night because I always missed him and don't have much time to talk. I always forget that we are in different timezone. His place is 2 hours faster than here. Thinking about that, I feel that recently I has cut his sleep time and I feel bad right now. Though he said that it's not my fault but I still feel bad. His sleep time has been chaos and everyday he needs to go working so early. He needs to have much sleep time, and I really need to hold my own feelings back, not to have him talking with me whenever I want. I need to do that!
I think to make his sleep time early than before. From now, he has to go to bed on 8 or 9 pm. I know that our quality time will be cut more, but it's okay if it's for his health. So, whenever we have free time, it will be our precious time. And his medicine will make him feeling asleep, so I think it will make him sleep faster easily. That's all I'm thinking about.
But, I can't do anything for him right now, and it's painful.
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